Ben vs. Spike nº3: Emo Closet
Benjamin: can we please discuss how Paramore is the greatest emo band -- if not straight up best band -- in the universe?
Spike: okay
Spike: yes
Spike: I mean, they aren't
Spike: but yes
Benjamin: Well. As a closet Emo fan, I find myself much less guilty for liking them because of the female singer.
Benjamin: Instead of feeling like im empathizing with wimpy guys singing about girl trouble, I'm finding myself sadistically enjoying being reprimanded for being being the dick ex boyfriend.
Spike: as a closet emo fan, I like them less for that
Spike: I don't like listening to emo to feel like the bad guy
Spike: women are terrible
Spike: hence emo
Benjamin: That's a fair point. But as the guy who was always loosing girls to assholes, perhaps I also feel like I am on Hayley's side (yes i know her name).
Spike: (it's worse that you know how to spell her name)
Benjamin: Which leads me to the second argument...their songs straddle the line between hopelessly whinny and extremely well crafted.
Benjamin: which is where I consider myself most of the time.
Spike: they have some propulsion to them
Spike: haha
Spike: they are almost interesting
Spike: I'll grant you that
Spike: I've been having a weird emo music day
Spike: so I'm gonna tangent a little bit
Spike: do you remember the Yellowcard EP before they got big and they were all about the violin
Spike: and he was doing backflips because he had to, not because someone was paying him to?
Spike: I feel like paramore never had that stage
Benjamin: YES!!!!!
Spike: they just came out already heavily produced
Benjamin: yellowcard used to slay so much face.
Spike: holy shit dude
Spike: sure shot
Benjamin: even on ocean avenue
Spike: yeah
Spike: but by then they were already pulling back the strings
Benjamin: once the violinist stopped doing backflips they started to suck
Spike: clearly
Spike: even dashboard had a period before he was uber produced and tight
Spike: when he was just one dude
Spike: where is that paramore?
Spike: do they sound like anything without the L.T. Smash magic music box making them sound good?
Benjamin: so are you saying that the only thing that legitimizes a pop-emo band is how hard-core they used to be?
Spike: I think so
Benjamin: well, that's fair
Benjamin: But by the same token, you are basically describing selling out.
Spike: it's the difference between new found glory and sum 41
Spike: sure
Benjamin: RIGHT!
Benjamin: new found glory is ok to still like because their first self-titled album was insanely amazing.
Spike: the movie cover album
Spike: the EP
Benjamin: that was good too.
Spike: that is the shit
Benjamin: you are also giving me a way to justify my inability to let go of less than jake.
Benjamin: so for that I thank you.
Spike: no problem there
Spike: they ate less than their dog or something
Spike: for me it's the ataris
Benjamin: ooooooh
Spike: who I think dictated how I deal with women
Spike: which is horrible
Benjamin: you covered songs for them instead of writing your own?
Benjamin: OH SNAP
Benjamin: OH SNAP
Benjamin: TRIPPLE SNAP
Spike: I'm not gonna count that
Spike: San Dimas High School Football Rules
Spike: they stole the movie quote
Spike: and broke my heart
Benjamin: hahaha
Benjamin: fair enough.
Spike: like a retarted version of the main character in high fidelity
Spike: retarded
Benjamin: Ok. i have to go read. But in light of this conversation, tonight will be one of many nights where I masturbate NOT to porn, but to the idea of having a serious girlfriend.
Spike: HAHAHA
Spike: do it
Benjamin: yo, how do we send this chat to miles
Sep 30th