the notes

Oh hey Melville House: want to hire me as your copy editor?

Thu, 23 May 2013 11:49:13 -0400

Oh hey Melville House: want to hire me as your copy editor?

Canon.

Wed, 22 May 2013 22:49:25 -0400

Canon.

Star Trek Into Darkness (2013) Spoiler follows. The way they...

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:46:18 -0400

Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)

Spoiler follows.

The way they beat Khan is by punching him hard enough.

May 21, 2013

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:34:00 -0400

May 21, 2013

Glancing into Damien’s bedroom, she sees that Marina’s luggage is the Louis Vuitton...

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:32:00 -0400

Glancing into Damien’s bedroom, she sees that Marina’s luggage is the Louis Vuitton stuff with the repeating monograms, the real and loathsome thing, to which she is intensely allergic. Two very new suitcases are open, spilling what she takes to be black Prada exclusively. On the twisted sheets, the silver oven-mitt comforter tossed aside on the floor, she sees a crumpled military garment in a camouflage pattern that she seems to recall is called tarn—information gathered during her time in the skateboard-clothing industry. She knows most of the patterns, and even that the most beautiful is South African, smoky mauve-toned Expressionist streaks suggesting a sunset landscape of great and alien beauty. Is tarn German camouflage, or Russian? English? She can’t remember. It means something else as well. A Poe word. Dead lakes?

William Gibson, Pattern Recognition

Iron Man 3 (2013) It’s not the script or direction by Shane...

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:24:00 -0400

Iron Man 3 (2013)

It’s not the script or direction by Shane Black of Lethal Weapon and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, though I am starting to think the man can’t write a movie that doesn’t take place over Christmas. Nor is it the villains—and the twist on Ben Kingsley’s role that is so good you have to be glad the trailers didn’t spoil it. Even the 140-minute running time didn’t cause scenes to drag very much. The issue is: all the characters keep talking about the events of The Avengers.

A cursory glance through my blueblood college’s class...

Mon, 20 May 2013 19:41:00 -0400

A cursory glance through my blueblood college’s class notes reveals a host of additional fantastic names, especially in years ‘36 through ‘72, including but not limited to:

Brit Faunce

Dericksen Brinkerhoff

McGurk MacGruer

Nip Mears

Cue Kellogg

Doc Weeth

Steele Taylor

Dusty Pritchett

Norden van Horne

Treat Arnold

Peter Vandervoort

Wally Bortz

Swifty Swift

Southerland Simpson

Coleman Holmsey

Pim Goodbody

Bruno Quinson

Bill Moomaw

Norm Cram

Chuck Dunkel

Cotton Fite

Quig Conley

Fin Fogg

Gump Gormley

Toes Moseley

Dick Tucker

Westy Saltonstall

Budge Upton

Wink Willett

Punky Booth

Bruce McNutt

Cecily Stone

Cole Werble

Emlen Drayton

Lusyd Doolittle

Mayo Shattuck

Wole Coaxum

Kip Cleaver

DC Dugdale

Donald McDonald

Cappy Ricks

Babe Kirk Unger

Gary Poon

Hugh “Hugh” Oxnard

Chuck Warshaver

Bennett Yort

Story Reed

Helen Mango

Kathy Mountcastle

Cindy Morehouse Bardwil

Dave Futterman

Hope Cookis-McCarthy

Gorham Blaine

Chenoweth Sites Allen

Mopsy Pepper

Alastair Moock

Binney Caffrey

Leigh (Olmstead) Blood

Haynes Cooney

Pippa Charters

Toygun Altintas

Decades Later And Across An Ocean, A Novel Gets Its Due

Mon, 20 May 2013 17:23:30 -0400

Decades Later And Across An Ocean, A Novel Gets Its Due:

nyrbclassics:

NYRB Classics series editor Edwin Frank was interviewed, along with Anna Gavalda, by NPR’s All Things Considered, about the amazing success John Williams’s Stoner is enjoying throughout Europe.

Once again: this is a book you must read or else.

The president’s coma had taken a turn for the worse: she was...

Mon, 20 May 2013 12:54:00 -0400

The president’s coma had taken a turn for the worse: she was dead. The VP shot himself before they could do the oath. Whoever came next in line met the void, called the wars off and undid the draft. Those of us in the last week of boot woke at dawn, synchronized, to find the top brass had already split.

First thing we did was whoop it up. Then we showered and set out for the women’s barracks to get it on. The women had had the same idea. We collided over the mortar range, which was dry and pockmarked and not ideal for fucking, but in the party that ensued we all got laid except Taylor, who despite running fifteen miles a day could just not stop being fat.

Taylor’s fatness was a joke at first, when he couldn’t keep up, but soon the joke became myth. We punched him on the pretext that he couldn’t feel. A lady soldier half-wearing my camo rode me in the hot dead grass, and I saw Taylor taking shade under the only tree, massaging feet that must have hurt like hell under all that weight.

The party depressed me after two days. By then I honestly couldn’t believe I was me. I hiked to the airbase and hitched a plane to Jersey. Except it was resupply to Jersey the goddamn island. I got to London and fit a southy crew that mugged tourists in the Elephant & Castle pedways. Other gangs raped down there; we mugged. We’d rip cams and phones from helpless fingers to fence in Camden for hash. I beat up an Italian for his hat.

“Drone,” a new story in 3:AM Magazine. If this opening doesn’t hook you I should maybe resign from fiction.

A couple of storefronts in my neighborhood never become actual...

Fri, 17 May 2013 20:27:00 -0400

A couple of storefronts in my neighborhood never become actual stores because every other month some film or TV production hastily remodels them for exterior shots. More often than not, they turn this one into a simulacrum of a barber shop. Today marks the first time I’ve wished the fiction were real.

“Freedom Tower,” a little text I wrote for Lawrence...

Fri, 17 May 2013 19:16:48 -0400

“Freedom Tower,” a little text I wrote for Lawrence Lek and The White Review’s Pyramid Schemes instillation in London, as rendered in the accompanying fold-out program, all of which you can scroll through sideways as if actually touring a city. Is this cool? It’s cool.

“The fuck’s the moon’s doing there?” “Yo, the moon is always...

Fri, 17 May 2013 17:59:00 -0400

“The fuck’s the moon’s doing there?”

“Yo, the moon is always there.”

May 17, 2013

Fri, 17 May 2013 17:53:34 -0400

May 17, 2013

Tummy & Monster, Dogtorneys at Law

Wed, 15 May 2013 19:33:00 -0400

Tummy & Monster, Dogtorneys at Law

Besides, how awkward would this be in practice? Is the disabled...

Tue, 14 May 2013 14:46:02 -0400

Besides, how awkward would this be in practice? Is the disabled person even allowed to talk to the family? Do they have to make up a detailed backstory in case Disney officials catch them? “Okay, you’ll be our Aunt Belinda, and you were paralyzed in a yachting accident.” Jesus Christ, just wait in line like all the poors have to. This may be your one chance to actually see them up close.

Rich Families Skip Disney World Lines With Handicapped Guides

May 12, 2013

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:09:44 -0400

May 12, 2013

"Miles Klee, on the other hand, is a rascal, a ne’er-do-well, and an alleged horse thief."

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:05:00 -0400

"Miles Klee, on the other hand, is a rascal, a ne’er-do-well, and an alleged horse thief.":

Interviewed by Jay Casey for The Worst at Dinosaur BBQ.

It’s a wonderful restaurant.

Extending the observation of Mother’s Day just a bit so we...

Tue, 14 May 2013 13:00:00 -0400

Extending the observation of Mother’s Day just a bit so we can revisit homemade cards of decades past, from myself (top) and my brother (bottom). My sister, meanwhile, once made her cry with the line “I love you past heaven and as far as my heart can go,” and thereafter used it every single year. And lest you think mine a little mean-spirited, know that I also once gave her a card that on the front said “Another day, another dollar, right Mom?” and on the inside read “OH THAT’S RIGHT YOU DON’T GET PAID.” Finally, please note that my brother’s card is laminated and has no text on the reverse side.

Went to Jersey for a Mother’s Day visit with flowers and a...

Mon, 13 May 2013 11:14:00 -0400

Went to Jersey for a Mother’s Day visit with flowers and a new book to give her. What’s the first thing I see when I walk in the door? That same book, on the coffee table. She’d bought it the day before. “You’re killing me,” I said. “I was actually going to get you a different one …” But I didn’t finish the thought because, upon picking up her copy of the book I’d bought her, I found a pristine copy of the other book I’d considered: she’d bought them at the same time. I give up. Anyway, here’s a still from The Adventures of Young Mom (Before She Was One).

wha??

Mon, 13 May 2013 09:53:15 -0400

Oh I think you know.